(1) 'Cause I want to find out where we are, that's why!
(2) You're driving. You oughta know where we are!
(3) Take a left.
(4) No, I said left!
(5) It's a desert, Leo. What difference does it make?
(6) Just once, can't you do like I ask?
(7) Relax, we're losing 'em.
(8) Maybe they'll run out of gas.
(9) I wish you hadn't said that.
(10) I said left!
(11) Two hundred stinkin' miles of stinkin' desert,
(12) and you gotta drive us into a stinkin' pool of stinkin' water!
(13) What do you figure the odds are on this?
(14) And I say they're bandits.
(15) Nah, they couldn't be.
(16) They would have killed us by now.
(17) Oh, no. The General.
(18) Watch, he'll probably say something stupid like,
(19) "So, gentlemen, we meet again."
(20) So, gentlemen, we meet again.
(21) See?
(22) You are responsible for this!
(23) Hey, I can't take all the credit. I mean, Leo here, he...
(24) Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
(25) Splendid!
(26) A moment frozen in time.
(27) It occurred to me that to leave you gentlemen
(28) here in this wretched heat, with nothing to drink,
(29) would be a cruel and merciless act.
(30) In three hours, your flesh will begin to blister.
(31) Two hours later, your tongues will swell.
(32) And all that time, you will be holding the liquid of life
(33) in your very own hand.
(34) And you'll still be bald.
(35) Should you need anything, gentlemen, just scream!
(36) Max, there's something I want to tell you.
(37) What?
(38) I really want you to know...
(39) that I blame you for this.
(40) Oh, Max.
(41) Hurry up, Max.
(42) Something is crawling up my legs!
(43) Leo, there's only so much I can do!
(44) Quick!
(45) They're crawling all over me!
(46) Oh, quit bellyaching.
(47) I'm getting us out of it, aren't I?
(48) Got us into it, too.
(49) Geez.
(50) I'd like to see the look on the General's face
(51) when he sees us gone.
(52) The only water we had, and you had to break it.
(53) Geez, that's gratitude for ya.
(54) All I can think of is a beer from Tubbs Bar.
(55) But that's in Arizona... 5,000 miles from here.
(56) Max, I'm quitting.
(57) Again?
(58) How many expeditions have we been on together?
(59) Hundreds. Fifteen.
(60) Fifteen, Max. In ten years.
(61) And how many have we made money on?
(62) Three, Max. Only three.
(63) That's not such a good average.
(64) Our average income... Leo...
(65) you're being a teacher again.
(66) It's a side of you I've never liked.
(67) Max, we keep sticking our necks out, and sooner or later,
(68) somebody's gonna chop our heads off.
(69) What'll it be, sister?
(70) May... may I have... see your wine list, please?
(71) I got it memorized. You want white or red?
(72) Red. Thank you.
(73) My sources inform me that this place is frequented by men of...
(74) shall we say, questionable character.
(75) No, here? Yes.
(76) I need men of undying loyalty...
(77) brave, not too smart.
(78) Two men, end of the bar.
(79) Tell 'em I said you was okay.
(80) Come on, Leo.
(81) You don't want to go back to being cooped up in a classroom again, do ya?
(82) The bartender says I'm okay.
(83) That's good enough for me.
(84) Good.
(85) This is gonna be easier than I thought.
(86) Hello, I'm Patricia Goodwin. Max Donigan, Leo Porter.
(87) Hello.
(88) Gentlemen, I have a business proposition for you.
(89) But I must warn you,
(90) the men I hire need to be very brave.
(91) Well, we...
(92) laugh in the face of death, right, Leo?
(93) Now it won't be easy. It might even be dangerous.
(94) But it could be worth a lot of money.
(95) Money?
(96) Money.
(97) You see, I've recently acquired a map,
(98) and I'm convinced it leads to a great amount of gold.
(99) What's the location?
(100) An Indian reservation not far from here near the border.
Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Comedy. Show all posts
Tuesday, January 26, 2016
Monday, January 25, 2016
[2012] [FDR: American Badass!] English Transcripts
(1) Now, the whole country is in a panic.
(2) We've been summoned to the White House
(3) knowing that the World War is upon us.
(4) Well, he comes bursting down the stairs
(5) with his dick resting over a hanger shouting,
(6) "Does this look too wrinkled to wear into Congress?"
(7) But that was Woodrow Wilson for you.
(8) He just didn't give a fuck.
(9) The next day
(10) we entered World War I,
(11) and the bitch of it is...
(12) I never got my iron back.
(13) We got movement.
(14) What do you think Bronson, is this our grizzly?
(15) Can't tell.
(16) It's moving between the trees too quickly.
(17) Have a look Governor Roosevelt.
(18) Oh, my God!
(19) What is it?
(20) Werewolf!
(21) Everybody run!
(22) [GROWLS] We're all going to die!
(23) Don't panic, we just got to make it back to the cabin.
(24) Wait! Wait!
(25) Why me? I'm fat and weak.
(26) Probably for exactly that reason.
(27) No!
(28) Let's get some, boys. No, we got to keep moving, Frank.
(29) They carry polio.
(30) [GROWLS]
(31) [GROANS]
(32) Fuck polio.
(33) Good shot, old boy.
(34) Did you put silver bullets in that thing, Frank?
(35) No, why?
(36) That's why. Run!
(37) Oh, shit.
(38) Sweet Jesus!
(39) What the shit?
(40) Ooh!
(41) Why even spend the time to do that?
(42) Frank, we got to get the hell out of here.
(43) No chair lift, we're never going to make it.
(44) We're going to have to go old school on this.
(45) This isn't a time for that we need silver bullets.
(46) [YELLS]
(47) Oh, sick goblins!
(48) Frank, I'm sorry.
(49) Tell Eleanor I love her.
(50) Eleanor has silver bullets.
(51) Eleanor.
(52) Frank, stay with me.
(53) Stay with me, Frank.
(54) Frank, Frank, stay with me, Frank.
(55) Please.
(56) [GASPS]
(57) Oh, thank God.
(58) Oh, I thought you were dead, Frank.
(59) Ain't nobody going to take down The Delano, Kitten Tits.
(60) Kitten Breasts, Frank.
(61) Hey, Frank, how you feeling?
(62) Like a bag full of dicks at a lesbian convention.
(63) Oh, language, Franklin.
(64) [FRENCH ACCENT] Eh, Comme sucka des dicks at a convention de lesbian.
(65) Oh, that's better.
(66) [KNOCK ON DOOR]
(67) Easy Lou, just me.
(68) Put that hamster back in its cage.
(69) Glad to see you awake, Governor Roosevelt.
(70) Let me just say, on behalf of the great State of New York,
(71) it is our honor Cut the shit, doc.
(72) If I wanted smoke blown up my ass,
(73) I would have spread my cheeks
(74) and jammed a whistling teapot up there.
(75) Why can't I feel my legs?
(76) When the werewolf attacked you and bit your leg,
(77) it released a small stream of
(78) You've got the polio, Frank.
(79) Does my cock still work?
(80) Yes, I had one of the nurses run tests.
(81) Well,
(82) why is everybody looking so down? Cock works.
(83) I'll be up and at it in no time.
(84) Oh, in two weeks, Lou, I want a rematch
(85) of that 100 yard dash, you son of a bitch.
(86) I'm going to get you this time!
(87) I'm going to get you!
(88) Frank, Frank, you're not hearing me.
(89) You'll never be able to walk again.
(90) What?
(91) That's the thing about werewolf attacks
(92) where you're bitten is where the polio sets in.
(93) In your case...
(94) it's your legs.
(95) [GASPS] Oh!
(96) God, no.
(97) Why?
(98) Why did you have to give him tiny, little, shriveled-up polio legs?
(99) Why, why!
(100) I love you Eleanor,
(2) We've been summoned to the White House
(3) knowing that the World War is upon us.
(4) Well, he comes bursting down the stairs
(5) with his dick resting over a hanger shouting,
(6) "Does this look too wrinkled to wear into Congress?"
(7) But that was Woodrow Wilson for you.
(8) He just didn't give a fuck.
(9) The next day
(10) we entered World War I,
(11) and the bitch of it is...
(12) I never got my iron back.
(13) We got movement.
(14) What do you think Bronson, is this our grizzly?
(15) Can't tell.
(16) It's moving between the trees too quickly.
(17) Have a look Governor Roosevelt.
(18) Oh, my God!
(19) What is it?
(20) Werewolf!
(21) Everybody run!
(22) [GROWLS] We're all going to die!
(23) Don't panic, we just got to make it back to the cabin.
(24) Wait! Wait!
(25) Why me? I'm fat and weak.
(26) Probably for exactly that reason.
(27) No!
(28) Let's get some, boys. No, we got to keep moving, Frank.
(29) They carry polio.
(30) [GROWLS]
(31) [GROANS]
(32) Fuck polio.
(33) Good shot, old boy.
(34) Did you put silver bullets in that thing, Frank?
(35) No, why?
(36) That's why. Run!
(37) Oh, shit.
(38) Sweet Jesus!
(39) What the shit?
(40) Ooh!
(41) Why even spend the time to do that?
(42) Frank, we got to get the hell out of here.
(43) No chair lift, we're never going to make it.
(44) We're going to have to go old school on this.
(45) This isn't a time for that we need silver bullets.
(46) [YELLS]
(47) Oh, sick goblins!
(48) Frank, I'm sorry.
(49) Tell Eleanor I love her.
(50) Eleanor has silver bullets.
(51) Eleanor.
(52) Frank, stay with me.
(53) Stay with me, Frank.
(54) Frank, Frank, stay with me, Frank.
(55) Please.
(56) [GASPS]
(57) Oh, thank God.
(58) Oh, I thought you were dead, Frank.
(59) Ain't nobody going to take down The Delano, Kitten Tits.
(60) Kitten Breasts, Frank.
(61) Hey, Frank, how you feeling?
(62) Like a bag full of dicks at a lesbian convention.
(63) Oh, language, Franklin.
(64) [FRENCH ACCENT] Eh, Comme sucka des dicks at a convention de lesbian.
(65) Oh, that's better.
(66) [KNOCK ON DOOR]
(67) Easy Lou, just me.
(68) Put that hamster back in its cage.
(69) Glad to see you awake, Governor Roosevelt.
(70) Let me just say, on behalf of the great State of New York,
(71) it is our honor Cut the shit, doc.
(72) If I wanted smoke blown up my ass,
(73) I would have spread my cheeks
(74) and jammed a whistling teapot up there.
(75) Why can't I feel my legs?
(76) When the werewolf attacked you and bit your leg,
(77) it released a small stream of
(78) You've got the polio, Frank.
(79) Does my cock still work?
(80) Yes, I had one of the nurses run tests.
(81) Well,
(82) why is everybody looking so down? Cock works.
(83) I'll be up and at it in no time.
(84) Oh, in two weeks, Lou, I want a rematch
(85) of that 100 yard dash, you son of a bitch.
(86) I'm going to get you this time!
(87) I'm going to get you!
(88) Frank, Frank, you're not hearing me.
(89) You'll never be able to walk again.
(90) What?
(91) That's the thing about werewolf attacks
(92) where you're bitten is where the polio sets in.
(93) In your case...
(94) it's your legs.
(95) [GASPS] Oh!
(96) God, no.
(97) Why?
(98) Why did you have to give him tiny, little, shriveled-up polio legs?
(99) Why, why!
(100) I love you Eleanor,
Friday, January 22, 2016
[2001] [Exit Wounds] English Transcripts
(1) Ladies and gentlemen...
(2) it's a pleasure for me to be here on such a beautiful day...
(3) in the great city of Detroit.
(4) And I'd love to tell you all...
(5) to sit back, relax and enjoy yourselves.
(6) I'd love to...
(7) but unfortunately, I can't do that.
(8) There's a very serious issue spiraling out of control in this country.
(9) Illegal handguns ending up in the hands of our children.
(10) Instead of reading off statistics that you might not already know...
(11) that last year, more preschoolers died from guns than police officers...
(12) or that gunshot wounds are the second leading cause of death...
(13) for all people in the U.S., ages 10 to 34.
(14) Hold it. Go on in.
(15) While he lay bleeding to death for 40 minutes...
(16) waiting for help to come.
(17) Darren was 16 years old.
(18) That could've been any one of your children.
(19) I hope you'll consider my four-year plan to get guns off the streets.
(20) I need your help and your support.
(21) Let's stop the pain and suffering Darren's family had to go through.
(22) God bless you and thank you.
(23) He just loves pissing me off. I'm sure he has his reasons.
(24) Thanks a lot.
(25) Thank you.
(26) Relax.
(27) I'll talk to him.
(28) Thank you, everybody.
(29) How are you? Good to see you.
(30) Mr. Vice President, sir?
(31) Bobby, what the hell is this?
(32) You believe this guy?
(33) Sorry, the bridge is closed until the V.P. gets across.
(34) You can't stay here. You have to move it out.
(35) Shit! Get down, sir!
(36) Get us out of here!
(37) Excuse me.
(38) Officers need help! On the bridge! Shots fired!
(39) Warn the D.P., they are dressed as cops!
(40) Repeat: They are dressed as cops!
(41) Alpha six to Bravo Air, keep cover...
(42) Stay down! What is going on?
(43) No cops on the bridge. We can't tell who's who.
(44) No Detroit P.D., Secret Service only.
(45) Officers need help. Motorcade's under attack!
(46) All units, stay off the bridge, as per Secret Service.
(47) All units stay off bridge...
(48) Goddamn it, I told you to clear the bridge!
(49) Bring the truck in!
(50) Goddamn it! Secret Service only!
(51) Who the hell is that?
(52) Get me out!
(53) Get me out of here! Get in.
(54) Who the hell are you? Off the bridge.
(55) We're not moving till the transport arrives.
(56) I'm not talking to you! Mr. Vice President, get in here!
(57) We need help here now!
(58) Alpha one to Alpha six.
(59) Move it out! Everything's under control!
(60) Jesus!
(61) Take out the Alpha vehicle!
(62) I'm sorry, sir. I got to do this.
(63) Shit! I can't swim.
(64) Don't move!
(65) Freeze!
(66) It's okay. I'm on the job.
(67) We got you, sir.
(68) You're going to be all right, sir.
(69) Why did you drive onto that bridge and start World War III?
(70) I saved his life, Frank. You were lucky, Orin.
(71) Extremely lucky.
(72) The Secret Service gave a direct order not to storm that bridge!
(73) They were responsible for him. Not you!
(74) What if it went the other way? I didn't vote for him.
(75) This is funny to you?
(76) What's funny to me is... Cut it out.
(77) Who were they?
(78) Some Michigan militant group.
(79) Live by the sword, man. Sit down.
(80) Look, Orin. We've known each other a long time.
(81) I am your friend, but also your boss.
(82) As your friend, you don't follow orders. You're unmanageable.
(83) You don't obey the law or think before you act.
(84) And now, as your boss, you're fired.
(85) Just like that. Hinges wants you out.
(86) There's nothing I can do.
(87) You want to talk to him yourself, be my guest.
(88) Now handle it!
(89) You are like a cockroach, Mr. Boyd.
(90) Every time I try to get rid of you, you appeal to the union...
(91) and they send your ass right back here.
(92) But not this time.
(93) I've been talking to the Secret Service figuring out what to do with you.
(94) They want you to suffer, Mr. Boyd.
(95) They want you to suffer bad for that stupid stunt you pulled.
(96) And I must say, I do not disagree.
(97) You guys are unbelievable.
(98) I saw a problem, I fixed it. Simple as that.
(99) That's bullshit, Mr. Boyd.
(100) Because of cops like you...
(2) it's a pleasure for me to be here on such a beautiful day...
(3) in the great city of Detroit.
(4) And I'd love to tell you all...
(5) to sit back, relax and enjoy yourselves.
(6) I'd love to...
(7) but unfortunately, I can't do that.
(8) There's a very serious issue spiraling out of control in this country.
(9) Illegal handguns ending up in the hands of our children.
(10) Instead of reading off statistics that you might not already know...
(11) that last year, more preschoolers died from guns than police officers...
(12) or that gunshot wounds are the second leading cause of death...
(13) for all people in the U.S., ages 10 to 34.
(14) Hold it. Go on in.
(15) While he lay bleeding to death for 40 minutes...
(16) waiting for help to come.
(17) Darren was 16 years old.
(18) That could've been any one of your children.
(19) I hope you'll consider my four-year plan to get guns off the streets.
(20) I need your help and your support.
(21) Let's stop the pain and suffering Darren's family had to go through.
(22) God bless you and thank you.
(23) He just loves pissing me off. I'm sure he has his reasons.
(24) Thanks a lot.
(25) Thank you.
(26) Relax.
(27) I'll talk to him.
(28) Thank you, everybody.
(29) How are you? Good to see you.
(30) Mr. Vice President, sir?
(31) Bobby, what the hell is this?
(32) You believe this guy?
(33) Sorry, the bridge is closed until the V.P. gets across.
(34) You can't stay here. You have to move it out.
(35) Shit! Get down, sir!
(36) Get us out of here!
(37) Excuse me.
(38) Officers need help! On the bridge! Shots fired!
(39) Warn the D.P., they are dressed as cops!
(40) Repeat: They are dressed as cops!
(41) Alpha six to Bravo Air, keep cover...
(42) Stay down! What is going on?
(43) No cops on the bridge. We can't tell who's who.
(44) No Detroit P.D., Secret Service only.
(45) Officers need help. Motorcade's under attack!
(46) All units, stay off the bridge, as per Secret Service.
(47) All units stay off bridge...
(48) Goddamn it, I told you to clear the bridge!
(49) Bring the truck in!
(50) Goddamn it! Secret Service only!
(51) Who the hell is that?
(52) Get me out!
(53) Get me out of here! Get in.
(54) Who the hell are you? Off the bridge.
(55) We're not moving till the transport arrives.
(56) I'm not talking to you! Mr. Vice President, get in here!
(57) We need help here now!
(58) Alpha one to Alpha six.
(59) Move it out! Everything's under control!
(60) Jesus!
(61) Take out the Alpha vehicle!
(62) I'm sorry, sir. I got to do this.
(63) Shit! I can't swim.
(64) Don't move!
(65) Freeze!
(66) It's okay. I'm on the job.
(67) We got you, sir.
(68) You're going to be all right, sir.
(69) Why did you drive onto that bridge and start World War III?
(70) I saved his life, Frank. You were lucky, Orin.
(71) Extremely lucky.
(72) The Secret Service gave a direct order not to storm that bridge!
(73) They were responsible for him. Not you!
(74) What if it went the other way? I didn't vote for him.
(75) This is funny to you?
(76) What's funny to me is... Cut it out.
(77) Who were they?
(78) Some Michigan militant group.
(79) Live by the sword, man. Sit down.
(80) Look, Orin. We've known each other a long time.
(81) I am your friend, but also your boss.
(82) As your friend, you don't follow orders. You're unmanageable.
(83) You don't obey the law or think before you act.
(84) And now, as your boss, you're fired.
(85) Just like that. Hinges wants you out.
(86) There's nothing I can do.
(87) You want to talk to him yourself, be my guest.
(88) Now handle it!
(89) You are like a cockroach, Mr. Boyd.
(90) Every time I try to get rid of you, you appeal to the union...
(91) and they send your ass right back here.
(92) But not this time.
(93) I've been talking to the Secret Service figuring out what to do with you.
(94) They want you to suffer, Mr. Boyd.
(95) They want you to suffer bad for that stupid stunt you pulled.
(96) And I must say, I do not disagree.
(97) You guys are unbelievable.
(98) I saw a problem, I fixed it. Simple as that.
(99) That's bullshit, Mr. Boyd.
(100) Because of cops like you...
Thursday, January 21, 2016
[1978] [Every Which Way But Loose] English Transcripts
(1) Son of a bitch.
(2) Anyway, the cop is sitting there, sipping his coffee, you see?
(3) And he's scratching his head. He's completely confused by now.
(4) He says to the drunk... How's it going, Philo?
(5) ..."What about the guy in bed with your wife?"
(6) And the drunk says, "The hell with him. Let him make his own coffee."
(7) You get it? "Let him make his own coffee."
(8) Excuse me.
(9) That's funny, but don't give up your day job.
(10) Come on, Big Al.
(11) Let's have some fun. You want to go some place?
(12) Hey, Big Al. Are you married? I used to be.
(13) MAN: I know this place in the valley. We could go get a couple drinks.
(14) Lots of action there. Great fun. What do you say?
(15) Hey. Put them back.
(16) You talking to me? This ain't the Salvation Army.
(17) Put them back.
(18) I got plenty of peanuts, Big Al.
(19) You mean these? Yeah, asshole.
(20) Unless you're taking them to your tree. Shit. Excuse me, gents.
(21) The squirrel is taking his peanuts up to his tree.
(22) The squirrel is ripping off peanuts, ain't you, squirrel?
(23) Going to take them up to your tree?
(24) MAN: All right.
(25) MAN 2: Come on, guys. Knock it off. MAN 3: Get him!
(26) Attaboy!
(27) Come on, get out of here, you guys. Get him.
(28) MAN 2: Outside. Come on, guys.
(29) Outside!
(30) [Every Which Way But Loose by Eddie Rabbitt playing]
(31) Hey, Orville, what's doing?
(32) Ma's going to try it again.
(33) I should have remembered my wig.
(34) You think it'll make any difference?
(35) I don't know, Ma.
(36) I don't expect that's all they're going to be looking at.
(37) Don't be in such a fired, big hurry.
(38) I want to look at these pictures one time more.
(39) I always did have trouble with these squiggly lines.
(40) I hope you pass it this time, Ma, because there ain't too many more...
(41) of these places we can go to. They all know you.
(42) They don't know how I drive. Don't none of them know how good I drive.
(43) Been driving since before them sons of bitches were born.
(44) Come on, get out.
(45) Here.
(46) You're getting pretty tricky, Clyde.
(47) You've done real good, Ma.
(48) Meathead.
(49) Waited till I passed the whole test before he tells me I'm too old.
(50) I should have remembered my wig.
(51) The hell with everybody.
(52) Come on, get going, for God's sake.
(53) Philo, are you out here? No, I ain't.
(54) What are you doing? Are you working on the car?
(55) Orville, that's two dumb questions in a row you've asked me.
(56) Here.
(57) Help me put that block under the car here.
(58) This one here? Yeah.
(59) You want it under the wheel or under the spring?
(60) Under the spring.
(61) There you go.
(62) Thanks. Sure.
(63) Ma's pissed. It's Clyde.
(64) He got out this morning, came over, and shit all over everything.
(65) How did she get him back?
(66) That's what she's pissed about. She had to bribe him with all her Oreos.
(67) Well, I'll make it up to her.
(68) You got one going tomorrow? Yeah, you coming?
(69) Sure am.
(70) Who wants some action around here?
(71) There you go, my man. What's the name?
(72) Name? John Hatfield.
(73) I got you, my man. Thank you. Who else?
(74) How much you want? Quick, talk to me, my man.
(75) Give me $80. 80. Let me see that.
(76) Name? Jackson.
(77) All right, listen, I've got $100. Who wants to make a side-bet, here?
(78) Come on, guys. Talk up!
(79) He may be good, but he ain't no Tank Murdock.
(80) Take it.
(81) We won't have anything Take it.
(82) You're on.
(83) Who's gonna hold this? You hold it.
(84) No problem, you're fine.
(85) Church, let's go, man.
(86) You got him.
(87) Come up here, Clyde. There you go.
(88) Put this bum away!
(89) Thank you. $5, $100 and $200...
(90) 500, $600, $900....
(91) PHILO: Clyde could have beat him.
(92) [Singing Send Me Down To Tuscon by Mel Tillis]
(93) I kind of like this.
(94) That one's a redhead.
(95) I'll take the one on the left. All right.
(96) The one stuffing her face with chowder.
(97) Let's go over there and see what she's drinking.
(98) Hi.
(99) My name's Philo. Do you mind if I sit here for a while?
(100) Suit yourself.
(2) Anyway, the cop is sitting there, sipping his coffee, you see?
(3) And he's scratching his head. He's completely confused by now.
(4) He says to the drunk... How's it going, Philo?
(5) ..."What about the guy in bed with your wife?"
(6) And the drunk says, "The hell with him. Let him make his own coffee."
(7) You get it? "Let him make his own coffee."
(8) Excuse me.
(9) That's funny, but don't give up your day job.
(10) Come on, Big Al.
(11) Let's have some fun. You want to go some place?
(12) Hey, Big Al. Are you married? I used to be.
(13) MAN: I know this place in the valley. We could go get a couple drinks.
(14) Lots of action there. Great fun. What do you say?
(15) Hey. Put them back.
(16) You talking to me? This ain't the Salvation Army.
(17) Put them back.
(18) I got plenty of peanuts, Big Al.
(19) You mean these? Yeah, asshole.
(20) Unless you're taking them to your tree. Shit. Excuse me, gents.
(21) The squirrel is taking his peanuts up to his tree.
(22) The squirrel is ripping off peanuts, ain't you, squirrel?
(23) Going to take them up to your tree?
(24) MAN: All right.
(25) MAN 2: Come on, guys. Knock it off. MAN 3: Get him!
(26) Attaboy!
(27) Come on, get out of here, you guys. Get him.
(28) MAN 2: Outside. Come on, guys.
(29) Outside!
(30) [Every Which Way But Loose by Eddie Rabbitt playing]
(31) Hey, Orville, what's doing?
(32) Ma's going to try it again.
(33) I should have remembered my wig.
(34) You think it'll make any difference?
(35) I don't know, Ma.
(36) I don't expect that's all they're going to be looking at.
(37) Don't be in such a fired, big hurry.
(38) I want to look at these pictures one time more.
(39) I always did have trouble with these squiggly lines.
(40) I hope you pass it this time, Ma, because there ain't too many more...
(41) of these places we can go to. They all know you.
(42) They don't know how I drive. Don't none of them know how good I drive.
(43) Been driving since before them sons of bitches were born.
(44) Come on, get out.
(45) Here.
(46) You're getting pretty tricky, Clyde.
(47) You've done real good, Ma.
(48) Meathead.
(49) Waited till I passed the whole test before he tells me I'm too old.
(50) I should have remembered my wig.
(51) The hell with everybody.
(52) Come on, get going, for God's sake.
(53) Philo, are you out here? No, I ain't.
(54) What are you doing? Are you working on the car?
(55) Orville, that's two dumb questions in a row you've asked me.
(56) Here.
(57) Help me put that block under the car here.
(58) This one here? Yeah.
(59) You want it under the wheel or under the spring?
(60) Under the spring.
(61) There you go.
(62) Thanks. Sure.
(63) Ma's pissed. It's Clyde.
(64) He got out this morning, came over, and shit all over everything.
(65) How did she get him back?
(66) That's what she's pissed about. She had to bribe him with all her Oreos.
(67) Well, I'll make it up to her.
(68) You got one going tomorrow? Yeah, you coming?
(69) Sure am.
(70) Who wants some action around here?
(71) There you go, my man. What's the name?
(72) Name? John Hatfield.
(73) I got you, my man. Thank you. Who else?
(74) How much you want? Quick, talk to me, my man.
(75) Give me $80. 80. Let me see that.
(76) Name? Jackson.
(77) All right, listen, I've got $100. Who wants to make a side-bet, here?
(78) Come on, guys. Talk up!
(79) He may be good, but he ain't no Tank Murdock.
(80) Take it.
(81) We won't have anything Take it.
(82) You're on.
(83) Who's gonna hold this? You hold it.
(84) No problem, you're fine.
(85) Church, let's go, man.
(86) You got him.
(87) Come up here, Clyde. There you go.
(88) Put this bum away!
(89) Thank you. $5, $100 and $200...
(90) 500, $600, $900....
(91) PHILO: Clyde could have beat him.
(92) [Singing Send Me Down To Tuscon by Mel Tillis]
(93) I kind of like this.
(94) That one's a redhead.
(95) I'll take the one on the left. All right.
(96) The one stuffing her face with chowder.
(97) Let's go over there and see what she's drinking.
(98) Hi.
(99) My name's Philo. Do you mind if I sit here for a while?
(100) Suit yourself.
Thursday, January 14, 2016
[2014] [Drive Hard] English Transcripts
(1) Yeah! That's great! That's great!
(2) Thank you! Thank you!
(3) Peter Roberts Yeah!
(4) Dad, wake up. Thank you! Thank you!
(5) Dad, wake up! What? What?
(6) Come on, we 'll be late Who is it? Who is it?
(7) Dad, wake up! We're going to be late!
(8) Who disturbs my sleep?
(9) Morning. Good Morning! Hi... Hi...
(10) Can you take Becca to school?
(11) I've got to be in court. I've got a 9 am.
(12) So do I. Sure. Yes.
(13) I'm taking you to school kid.
(14) You want an orange? I already have an orange.
(15) What's for breakfast? You're too late.
(16) By the way, have you called that guy about the job?
(17) What job? No, not yet.
(18) I told him you would.
(19) It's an office job
(20) but it pays more than you're earning now,
(21) and in case you didn't notice we need the money.
(22) I just don't feel like...
(23) I won't be very fulfilled...
(24) in a...
(25) office. I've got to go.
(26) But Freddy's so close on the money.
(27) I talked to him. I talked to him last week.
(28) He hasn't called me back yet,
(29) but he's so close on the cash, man, it's just like...
(30) It's just like... Maybe Freddy
(31) can pay our mortgage.
(32) Are you two going to fight again?
(33) Go get your bag, honey. Yeah, go get dressed.
(34) Go put on a tie or something.
(35) Look, I 'm sorry, but using our money
(36) to put a down payment on that monstrosity.
(37) It's not a monstrosity.
(38) What is it? It's a school.
(39) It's racing school. It's a school where people race.
(40) And I teach them.
(41) I teach them how to race.
(42) Because that's what I'm good at. It's what I do.
(43) I'm gonna be late.
(44) What I used to do.
(45) Now I don't do that.
(46) Wait, don't leave me!
(47) Do we have to go in your car?
(48) What does it look like?
(49) You see any other cars around here?
(50) Whoa, whoa whoa. You can sit up front with me.
(51) No, someone might see me!
(52) This is a perfectly good car, kid.
(53) Your dad makes his living driving this car.
(54) Okay, speed bump.
(55) This car, it pays for your clothes,
(56) it pays for your food, it pays for
(57) this incredibly expensive school that you take for granted.
(58) Mommy pays for most of it.
(59) Nice.
(60) OK Junior.
(61) Go on.
(62) Have fun, OK?
(63) Love you. See you. Bye.
(64) Y'ello.
(65) Oh hi, yeah.
(66) I'm just... outside.
(67) Yes, sure, if you can give me another couple of weeks
(68) then I will have the money. I...
(69) Yes, I... understand.
(70) But we've had some...
(71) plumbing problems lately.
(72) And I mean wow, like... really expensive.
(73) So, I'm a little short right now. What?
(74) No, no, no, I understand.
(75) I understand completely.
(76) There's always public school.
(77) Thank you. Thank you so much.
(78) It's another beautiful day
(79) on the Gold Coast.
(80) 24 degrees Celsius with
(81) perfect beach conditions forecast.
(82) ...will experience a late morning change
(83) with a storm front moving in from the west
(84) bringing scattered showers from the hinterland
(85) and coastal ranges.
(86) Monday through Saturday.
(87) Sundays can be arranged but at a higher cost.
(88) I will just as soon as he walks in.
(89) Good morning sexy lady. Thank you. - Sorry.
(90) How are we today?
(91) Do that great accent that you do. No.
(92) Come on, just one more time. No!
(93) Hi Mr. Roberts. You're back.
(94) Again.
(95) Um... yeah.
(96) I wasn't scheduled until 9.
(97) 9 o'clock? It can't be 9 o'clock.
(98) Ow! Jesus Christ!
(99) Are you alright? It's hot!
(100) Do you need help? Hey! Back up! Sit!
(2) Thank you! Thank you!
(3) Peter Roberts Yeah!
(4) Dad, wake up. Thank you! Thank you!
(5) Dad, wake up! What? What?
(6) Come on, we 'll be late Who is it? Who is it?
(7) Dad, wake up! We're going to be late!
(8) Who disturbs my sleep?
(9) Morning. Good Morning! Hi... Hi...
(10) Can you take Becca to school?
(11) I've got to be in court. I've got a 9 am.
(12) So do I. Sure. Yes.
(13) I'm taking you to school kid.
(14) You want an orange? I already have an orange.
(15) What's for breakfast? You're too late.
(16) By the way, have you called that guy about the job?
(17) What job? No, not yet.
(18) I told him you would.
(19) It's an office job
(20) but it pays more than you're earning now,
(21) and in case you didn't notice we need the money.
(22) I just don't feel like...
(23) I won't be very fulfilled...
(24) in a...
(25) office. I've got to go.
(26) But Freddy's so close on the money.
(27) I talked to him. I talked to him last week.
(28) He hasn't called me back yet,
(29) but he's so close on the cash, man, it's just like...
(30) It's just like... Maybe Freddy
(31) can pay our mortgage.
(32) Are you two going to fight again?
(33) Go get your bag, honey. Yeah, go get dressed.
(34) Go put on a tie or something.
(35) Look, I 'm sorry, but using our money
(36) to put a down payment on that monstrosity.
(37) It's not a monstrosity.
(38) What is it? It's a school.
(39) It's racing school. It's a school where people race.
(40) And I teach them.
(41) I teach them how to race.
(42) Because that's what I'm good at. It's what I do.
(43) I'm gonna be late.
(44) What I used to do.
(45) Now I don't do that.
(46) Wait, don't leave me!
(47) Do we have to go in your car?
(48) What does it look like?
(49) You see any other cars around here?
(50) Whoa, whoa whoa. You can sit up front with me.
(51) No, someone might see me!
(52) This is a perfectly good car, kid.
(53) Your dad makes his living driving this car.
(54) Okay, speed bump.
(55) This car, it pays for your clothes,
(56) it pays for your food, it pays for
(57) this incredibly expensive school that you take for granted.
(58) Mommy pays for most of it.
(59) Nice.
(60) OK Junior.
(61) Go on.
(62) Have fun, OK?
(63) Love you. See you. Bye.
(64) Y'ello.
(65) Oh hi, yeah.
(66) I'm just... outside.
(67) Yes, sure, if you can give me another couple of weeks
(68) then I will have the money. I...
(69) Yes, I... understand.
(70) But we've had some...
(71) plumbing problems lately.
(72) And I mean wow, like... really expensive.
(73) So, I'm a little short right now. What?
(74) No, no, no, I understand.
(75) I understand completely.
(76) There's always public school.
(77) Thank you. Thank you so much.
(78) It's another beautiful day
(79) on the Gold Coast.
(80) 24 degrees Celsius with
(81) perfect beach conditions forecast.
(82) ...will experience a late morning change
(83) with a storm front moving in from the west
(84) bringing scattered showers from the hinterland
(85) and coastal ranges.
(86) Monday through Saturday.
(87) Sundays can be arranged but at a higher cost.
(88) I will just as soon as he walks in.
(89) Good morning sexy lady. Thank you. - Sorry.
(90) How are we today?
(91) Do that great accent that you do. No.
(92) Come on, just one more time. No!
(93) Hi Mr. Roberts. You're back.
(94) Again.
(95) Um... yeah.
(96) I wasn't scheduled until 9.
(97) 9 o'clock? It can't be 9 o'clock.
(98) Ow! Jesus Christ!
(99) Are you alright? It's hot!
(100) Do you need help? Hey! Back up! Sit!
Thursday, January 7, 2016
[1994] [Double Dragon] English Transcripts
(1) MAN: Thousands of years ago in ancient China,
(2) an evil army of shadow warriors...
(3) terrorized the great city of Shang-sa.
(4) To save his people,
(5) the good king sacrificed himself to create a mystical medallion.
(6) Realizing the ultimate powers of the medallion,
(7) the king split it in half.
(8) To one son, he gave the power over body;
(9) to the other, power over the soul.
(10) This is the legend of the Double Dragon.
(11) Come on! Hyah!
(12) [People screaming]
(13) [Speaking Chinese]
(14) Shuko, Lash. We found it.
(15) MAN: The king knew that together his sons would be triumphant...
(16) and return peace to the land.
(17) After their victory, the princes hid the medallions...
(18) to prevent them from ever being used...for evil.
(19) [Rumbling]
(20) [Rattling]
(21) Afraid of a little aftershock? Don't be.
(22) They're a...prophecy.
(23) Seven years ago, the quake heralded my arrival.
(24) Over the centuries, many lives have been spent...
(25) searching for the legendary Double Dragon.
(26) Now...
(27) it's mine.
(28) This is only half of it. Where is the second dragon?
(29) Find me the other half now!
(30) ANNOUNCER: Three points! Defend!
(31) [Crowd cheering]
(32) Come on, Jimmy. Jimmy, watch his spin kick!
(33) MAN: Come on, Jim. Watch it!
(34) Yeah!
(35) [Rumbling]
(36) ANNOUNCER: Remain calm.
(37) This is an aftershock, not a quake.
(38) MAN: Yeah!
(39) Yeah, Jimmy!
(40) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Lee.
(41) MAN: Watch his spinning round kick!
(42) Save some for me. ln a minute.
(43) JlMMY: Billy! BlLLY: You're tagged, bro!
(44) Woo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! You!
(45) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Lee.
(46) Dragonfly, l tell you when you tag me.
(47) Don't call me Dragonfly.
(48) Call him dragon dropping! Come on!
(49) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Red.
(50) REFEREE: All right, neutral positions!
(51) Three points Red. Three points Red. Go!
(52) All right, 10 points for us. What? Wha
(53) Get him off! Billy!
(54) Get him off! Ah! Get off!
(55) MAN: Stay down where you belong! REFEREE: Neutral corner!
(56) REFEREE: Neutral corner! BlLLY: Come on!
(57) BlLLY: Come on! MAN: You want some? No way!
(58) ANNOUNCER: Team Lee has been disqualified.
(59) Team Red has won the Southwest Championship.
(60) JlMMY: History repeats itself.
(61) Congratulations, Billy. You lost the prize money.
(62) BlLLY: You were playing it safe. l was having fun.
(63) Have fun out of the ring! What a buzz kill!
(64) Better luck next time...losers.
(65) [Man laughing]
(66) East some fist, buttheads! Billy, no!
(67) You're dead, loser! Aah!
(68) MAN: Look out!
(69) lt's Sunday. You're watching the Raiders-Gladiators game.
(70) Suddenly the house collapses.
(71) How embarrassing. lt's not your fault.
(72) lt's everybody's fault. Go to Jack City.
(73) You can choose from hundreds of colors.
(74) Remember, if you didn't buy from us...
(75) you don't know Jack [Clap] City.
(76) WOMAN: From Hollywood Harbor to the Tijuana border,
(77) this is New Angeles' number one nightly news,
(78) with George Hamilton and Vanna White.
(79) lt's daylight savings time again.
(80) Set your clocks one hour ahead,
(81) or tomorrow, you may find yourself out after curfew.
(82) VANNA: l get them mixed up,
(83) whether to go forward or backward.
(84) Ha ha ha! That's great, Vanna.
(85) Andy, how's it look out there?
(86) Oh, you two are crazy.
(87) We don't want our viewers playing beat the clock...
(88) with the city gangs.
(89) Our ratings might go down. Ha ha! Boom ! OK! Oh, boy!
(90) Pack your oxygen masks tomorrow. We're in for some black rain.
(91) All the smog fans won't blow this away.
(92) lf you have a smog fan, stay near it.
(93) lf you don't, get a job.
(94) Our live pictures are beamed from police headquarters...
(95) as Chief Delario reels his officers in for the night.
(96) As the police reclaim the streets tomorrow morning,
(97) expect balmy temperatures throughout New Angeles.
(98) We got everybody in? Yes, sir.
(99) Good. See you tomorrow.
(100) ANDY DlCK: ...precipitation in Lake Pasadena,
(2) an evil army of shadow warriors...
(3) terrorized the great city of Shang-sa.
(4) To save his people,
(5) the good king sacrificed himself to create a mystical medallion.
(6) Realizing the ultimate powers of the medallion,
(7) the king split it in half.
(8) To one son, he gave the power over body;
(9) to the other, power over the soul.
(10) This is the legend of the Double Dragon.
(11) Come on! Hyah!
(12) [People screaming]
(13) [Speaking Chinese]
(14) Shuko, Lash. We found it.
(15) MAN: The king knew that together his sons would be triumphant...
(16) and return peace to the land.
(17) After their victory, the princes hid the medallions...
(18) to prevent them from ever being used...for evil.
(19) [Rumbling]
(20) [Rattling]
(21) Afraid of a little aftershock? Don't be.
(22) They're a...prophecy.
(23) Seven years ago, the quake heralded my arrival.
(24) Over the centuries, many lives have been spent...
(25) searching for the legendary Double Dragon.
(26) Now...
(27) it's mine.
(28) This is only half of it. Where is the second dragon?
(29) Find me the other half now!
(30) ANNOUNCER: Three points! Defend!
(31) [Crowd cheering]
(32) Come on, Jimmy. Jimmy, watch his spin kick!
(33) MAN: Come on, Jim. Watch it!
(34) Yeah!
(35) [Rumbling]
(36) ANNOUNCER: Remain calm.
(37) This is an aftershock, not a quake.
(38) MAN: Yeah!
(39) Yeah, Jimmy!
(40) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Lee.
(41) MAN: Watch his spinning round kick!
(42) Save some for me. ln a minute.
(43) JlMMY: Billy! BlLLY: You're tagged, bro!
(44) Woo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! You!
(45) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Lee.
(46) Dragonfly, l tell you when you tag me.
(47) Don't call me Dragonfly.
(48) Call him dragon dropping! Come on!
(49) ANNOUNCER: Three points, team Red.
(50) REFEREE: All right, neutral positions!
(51) Three points Red. Three points Red. Go!
(52) All right, 10 points for us. What? Wha
(53) Get him off! Billy!
(54) Get him off! Ah! Get off!
(55) MAN: Stay down where you belong! REFEREE: Neutral corner!
(56) REFEREE: Neutral corner! BlLLY: Come on!
(57) BlLLY: Come on! MAN: You want some? No way!
(58) ANNOUNCER: Team Lee has been disqualified.
(59) Team Red has won the Southwest Championship.
(60) JlMMY: History repeats itself.
(61) Congratulations, Billy. You lost the prize money.
(62) BlLLY: You were playing it safe. l was having fun.
(63) Have fun out of the ring! What a buzz kill!
(64) Better luck next time...losers.
(65) [Man laughing]
(66) East some fist, buttheads! Billy, no!
(67) You're dead, loser! Aah!
(68) MAN: Look out!
(69) lt's Sunday. You're watching the Raiders-Gladiators game.
(70) Suddenly the house collapses.
(71) How embarrassing. lt's not your fault.
(72) lt's everybody's fault. Go to Jack City.
(73) You can choose from hundreds of colors.
(74) Remember, if you didn't buy from us...
(75) you don't know Jack [Clap] City.
(76) WOMAN: From Hollywood Harbor to the Tijuana border,
(77) this is New Angeles' number one nightly news,
(78) with George Hamilton and Vanna White.
(79) lt's daylight savings time again.
(80) Set your clocks one hour ahead,
(81) or tomorrow, you may find yourself out after curfew.
(82) VANNA: l get them mixed up,
(83) whether to go forward or backward.
(84) Ha ha ha! That's great, Vanna.
(85) Andy, how's it look out there?
(86) Oh, you two are crazy.
(87) We don't want our viewers playing beat the clock...
(88) with the city gangs.
(89) Our ratings might go down. Ha ha! Boom ! OK! Oh, boy!
(90) Pack your oxygen masks tomorrow. We're in for some black rain.
(91) All the smog fans won't blow this away.
(92) lf you have a smog fan, stay near it.
(93) lf you don't, get a job.
(94) Our live pictures are beamed from police headquarters...
(95) as Chief Delario reels his officers in for the night.
(96) As the police reclaim the streets tomorrow morning,
(97) expect balmy temperatures throughout New Angeles.
(98) We got everybody in? Yes, sir.
(99) Good. See you tomorrow.
(100) ANDY DlCK: ...precipitation in Lake Pasadena,
Wednesday, December 16, 2015
[1988] [Crocodile Dundee II] English Transcripts
(1) You in the dinghy! This is the police.
(2) Put your hands on your head.
(3) Mick?
(4) G'day, Sarge!
(5) I might have known it would be you.
(6) It's these New York fish, Sarge, they won't take the bait.
(7) Breakfast.
(8) Get outta here! Come on, let's go.
(9) Mick?
(10) Breakfast.
(11) What are you doing up there? You scared me.
(12) Just admiring the view. You want coffee?
(13) Yeah.
(14) Are you thinking about home? Yeah.
(15) I guess you miss it. The bush? A bit.
(16) I was thinking I could be sitting in the bar at Walkabout Creek right now,
(17) gazing across at Wally and Nugget and Donk.
(18) Or I could be here looking at you. No contest.
(19) Actually, I was thinking about looking for a job.
(20) You're kidding.
(21) No. A man can't stay on holidays forever.
(22) Well, you seem to have managed okay so far.
(23) I would've started looking for a job last week,
(24) only I wanted to see Doug meet his mysterious twin brother.
(25) Doug who? On TV. Days of Our Lives.
(26) Oh, Mick! We definitely have to get you a job!
(27) Hey, Mick, my friend didn't see you throw. Could you show him? Huh?
(28) Um...
(29) You can go play. I've got to go to work.
(30) Play?
(31) Don't forget lunch. No worries. All right. Wait a minute.
(32) Where's the rabbit? Here it is.
(33) Yeah. Right. That's a rabbit.
(34) You take the rabbit, put it down over there somewhere
(35) then get right out of the way. Okay.
(36) Rocks? Yup.
(37) Don't miss, Mick.
(38) Close your eyes! All right.
(39) One.
(40) Two.
(41) Three.
(42) Four. Okay, you can look.
(43) Yay!
(44) Any good? That was the best, Mick.
(45) Know how come he can throw like that?
(46) In the bushes, if you miss, you don't eat. Isn't that right, Mick?
(47) That's right. But that's only half of it. First, you gotta find the animals.
(48) Here. What's this?
(49) A snake. That's a snake trail. Quick.
(50) Snakes are good eating.
(51) What's this one?
(52) That's a goanna, a real big lizard. Right.
(53) You can eat it, but it tastes like shit, right, Mick?
(54) Yeah... Here's another one, real quick.
(55) What's that? Don't know?
(56) Dunlop radials, Tony's bike.
(57) That was a good one. All right, practice.
(58) Bye, Mick. Bye. See you later. Bye-bye.
(59) See you later! Bye!
(60) And don't forget lunch! That was good, right?
(61) G'day, Al. Hiya, Mick.
(62) What'll you have? Just a beer, mate.
(63) Mind if I make an announcement? Go right ahead.
(64) Thanks.
(65) Mick Dundee's the name. Fairly new in town.
(66) Looking for some kind of a job.
(67) Any suggestions?
(68) That's enough job hunting for one day.
(69) Yo, Mick, my man! G'day, Leroy.
(70) So, like, you're looking for work? Hmm. Kinda.
(71) Well, then look no further.
(72) I can get you into something sweet. Great.
(73) Let me just grab some cigarettes, then we'll talk some business.
(74) Okay.
(75) Hey.
(76) I noticed you're getting pretty tight with Leroy.
(77) Yeah, nice fella.
(78) Let me warn you, he's a bad dude.
(79) He's into some pretty heavy shit.
(80) Leroy? Seems harmless enough. Just so you know.
(81) Yo, Mick, let's walk. Less ears on the street.
(82) Okay. Back in a sec.
(83) Okay, like... I got a little supply business going, right?
(84) Hey, like you will work for me. Oh. What would I be doing?
(85) Delivering stuff. Stuff?
(86) This is just between you and me. This goes no further, right?
(87) Right.
(88) Stationery.
(89) Stationery? Shh!
(90) You know, pens, erasers, office supplies.
(91) And that's heavy shit? No, man, it ain't.
(92) I'm strictly legit.
(93) But when you have a name like Leroy Brown,
(94) people expect you to be bad.
(95) You know, like the song.
(96) Oh, right!
(97) But, uh...
(98) I kinda like the image. Yeah.
(99) You dig? Yup. Dig.
(100) Is that part of the job? Digging?
(2) Put your hands on your head.
(3) Mick?
(4) G'day, Sarge!
(5) I might have known it would be you.
(6) It's these New York fish, Sarge, they won't take the bait.
(7) Breakfast.
(8) Get outta here! Come on, let's go.
(9) Mick?
(10) Breakfast.
(11) What are you doing up there? You scared me.
(12) Just admiring the view. You want coffee?
(13) Yeah.
(14) Are you thinking about home? Yeah.
(15) I guess you miss it. The bush? A bit.
(16) I was thinking I could be sitting in the bar at Walkabout Creek right now,
(17) gazing across at Wally and Nugget and Donk.
(18) Or I could be here looking at you. No contest.
(19) Actually, I was thinking about looking for a job.
(20) You're kidding.
(21) No. A man can't stay on holidays forever.
(22) Well, you seem to have managed okay so far.
(23) I would've started looking for a job last week,
(24) only I wanted to see Doug meet his mysterious twin brother.
(25) Doug who? On TV. Days of Our Lives.
(26) Oh, Mick! We definitely have to get you a job!
(27) Hey, Mick, my friend didn't see you throw. Could you show him? Huh?
(28) Um...
(29) You can go play. I've got to go to work.
(30) Play?
(31) Don't forget lunch. No worries. All right. Wait a minute.
(32) Where's the rabbit? Here it is.
(33) Yeah. Right. That's a rabbit.
(34) You take the rabbit, put it down over there somewhere
(35) then get right out of the way. Okay.
(36) Rocks? Yup.
(37) Don't miss, Mick.
(38) Close your eyes! All right.
(39) One.
(40) Two.
(41) Three.
(42) Four. Okay, you can look.
(43) Yay!
(44) Any good? That was the best, Mick.
(45) Know how come he can throw like that?
(46) In the bushes, if you miss, you don't eat. Isn't that right, Mick?
(47) That's right. But that's only half of it. First, you gotta find the animals.
(48) Here. What's this?
(49) A snake. That's a snake trail. Quick.
(50) Snakes are good eating.
(51) What's this one?
(52) That's a goanna, a real big lizard. Right.
(53) You can eat it, but it tastes like shit, right, Mick?
(54) Yeah... Here's another one, real quick.
(55) What's that? Don't know?
(56) Dunlop radials, Tony's bike.
(57) That was a good one. All right, practice.
(58) Bye, Mick. Bye. See you later. Bye-bye.
(59) See you later! Bye!
(60) And don't forget lunch! That was good, right?
(61) G'day, Al. Hiya, Mick.
(62) What'll you have? Just a beer, mate.
(63) Mind if I make an announcement? Go right ahead.
(64) Thanks.
(65) Mick Dundee's the name. Fairly new in town.
(66) Looking for some kind of a job.
(67) Any suggestions?
(68) That's enough job hunting for one day.
(69) Yo, Mick, my man! G'day, Leroy.
(70) So, like, you're looking for work? Hmm. Kinda.
(71) Well, then look no further.
(72) I can get you into something sweet. Great.
(73) Let me just grab some cigarettes, then we'll talk some business.
(74) Okay.
(75) Hey.
(76) I noticed you're getting pretty tight with Leroy.
(77) Yeah, nice fella.
(78) Let me warn you, he's a bad dude.
(79) He's into some pretty heavy shit.
(80) Leroy? Seems harmless enough. Just so you know.
(81) Yo, Mick, let's walk. Less ears on the street.
(82) Okay. Back in a sec.
(83) Okay, like... I got a little supply business going, right?
(84) Hey, like you will work for me. Oh. What would I be doing?
(85) Delivering stuff. Stuff?
(86) This is just between you and me. This goes no further, right?
(87) Right.
(88) Stationery.
(89) Stationery? Shh!
(90) You know, pens, erasers, office supplies.
(91) And that's heavy shit? No, man, it ain't.
(92) I'm strictly legit.
(93) But when you have a name like Leroy Brown,
(94) people expect you to be bad.
(95) You know, like the song.
(96) Oh, right!
(97) But, uh...
(98) I kinda like the image. Yeah.
(99) You dig? Yup. Dig.
(100) Is that part of the job? Digging?
[2009] [Crank: High Voltage] English Transcripts
(1) In a story so bizarre...
(2) ...I can scarcely believe the events I'm reporting...
(3) ...and yet corroborated by a dozen eyewitnesses...
(4) ...a white male apparently fell from the sky...
(5) ...above downtown Los Angeles today...
(6) ...landed in the middle of a busy intersection...
(7) ...destroying one vehicle and hospitalizing its elderly driver...
(8) ...and was removed from the scene...
(9) ...before emergency personnel could respond.
(10) Without a body, the police have yet to piece together events of a day...
(11) ...that can only be described as implausible.
(12) Reports of a body landing in the Boyle Heights area...
(13) ...have yet to be confirmed, and are being treated...
(14) ...as the bullshit they most likely are.
(15) You big cock English.
(16) Strong like horse.
(17) Fuck that.
(18) That's not so bad.
(19) Nice.
(20) Pick up, Eve.
(21) The number you have reached is not in service.
(22) Fuck.
(23) Shit.
(24) You lost?
(25) Nope.
(26) Shit.
(27) On your knees, Slim.
(28) Okay, Chow Mein.
(29) Who do you work for? Fuck you, Chelios.
(30) Fucking grunt.
(31) You found me in quite an unpleasant mood this morning, mate.
(32) Now, I'm gonna ask you this question one time.
(33) Who's gots my fucking strawberry tart?
(34) Capiche?
(35) Just spit the fucking name out.
(36) Johnny Vang!
(37) Johnny fucking Vang? Johnny fucking Vang?
(38) Good boy. Where? Cypress Social Club!
(39) Cypress- Cypress Social Club.
(40) Now, you're sure about that, ain't you?
(41) Good boy. Thanks for coming.
(42) Now, you can keep that.
(43) Fuck.
(44) Hello. Doc Miles.
(45) Yeah, Doc, it's Chev.
(46) Jesus H. Chelios.
(47) You gotta be kidding me.
(48) Listen. I'm deadly fucking serious, Doc.
(49) These Triad motherfuckers cut out my fucking heart...
(50) ...and put in one of those artificial jobs.
(51) You got an artificial heart?
(52) You think I'm having a fucking laugh?
(53) No, but you gotta admit, it's a little out there.
(54) You take your fucking time, Doc. You don't have any time.
(55) They're not designed to keep you alive more than a couple of days.
(56) And don't do anything strenuous. Yeah, sure, Doc. No problem.
(57) So, what's my next fucking move?
(58) We gotta get a real heart put in you, preferably your own.
(59) I'm on it. Okay, you're on it.
(60) Doc, Jesus fucking Christ! I'm sorry. Sorry.
(61) Let me- Does that thing have a belt battery pack?
(62) Check. How many bars are showing?
(63) One. Shit. That's better than none, I guess.
(64) Look, what they did you with is an Avicor Total Artificial Heart.
(65) It's got an internal battery that'll pick up once the belt battery dies.
(66) It's like a reserve tank.
(67) Once the internal battery takes over, you got one fucking hour.
(68) The internal battery charges wirelessly...
(69) ...through a transcutaneous energy-transfer system.
(70) Two coils There's one internal, one external.
(71) that transmit via a magnetic force across the skin...
(72) ...without piercing the surface.
(73) The internal coil receives power and sends it to the controller device.
(74) Does this make any fucking sense to you, Chevy?
(75) It's fucking Greek, Doc.
(76) Greek.
(77) Look, you gotta keep your body electrically charged...
(78) ... to keep that piece of shit pumping. Copy that.
(79) Hey, Chev? Yeah.
(80) I'm stoked you're alive, dude. I'll get back to you, Doc.
(81) Yeah. Call me.
(82) Fuck.
(83) Hey, hey, hey! That's a nice car.
(84) Don't suppose you know where the Cypress Social Club is, do you?
(85) Man, fuck that shit, puto. Let's race, יse.
(86) Don't you tempt me, fucker.
(87) What I need from you is directions.
(88) Shit.
(89) Damn, dog. You good, יse?
(90) Tiger fucking Woods.
(91) Never better.
(92) Greatest day of my fucking life.
(93) You couldn't point me in the direction of the Cypress Social Club, could you?
(94) Well, you ain't too far.
(95) Go down Orange for, like, 2 miles, and then you're there, homes.
(96) You mind giving me a jump?
(97) Just juice me.
(98) Anybody know where's the fucking Social Club?
(99) Donde esta la Social Club?
(100) Buenos nachos, white boy.
(2) ...I can scarcely believe the events I'm reporting...
(3) ...and yet corroborated by a dozen eyewitnesses...
(4) ...a white male apparently fell from the sky...
(5) ...above downtown Los Angeles today...
(6) ...landed in the middle of a busy intersection...
(7) ...destroying one vehicle and hospitalizing its elderly driver...
(8) ...and was removed from the scene...
(9) ...before emergency personnel could respond.
(10) Without a body, the police have yet to piece together events of a day...
(11) ...that can only be described as implausible.
(12) Reports of a body landing in the Boyle Heights area...
(13) ...have yet to be confirmed, and are being treated...
(14) ...as the bullshit they most likely are.
(15) You big cock English.
(16) Strong like horse.
(17) Fuck that.
(18) That's not so bad.
(19) Nice.
(20) Pick up, Eve.
(21) The number you have reached is not in service.
(22) Fuck.
(23) Shit.
(24) You lost?
(25) Nope.
(26) Shit.
(27) On your knees, Slim.
(28) Okay, Chow Mein.
(29) Who do you work for? Fuck you, Chelios.
(30) Fucking grunt.
(31) You found me in quite an unpleasant mood this morning, mate.
(32) Now, I'm gonna ask you this question one time.
(33) Who's gots my fucking strawberry tart?
(34) Capiche?
(35) Just spit the fucking name out.
(36) Johnny Vang!
(37) Johnny fucking Vang? Johnny fucking Vang?
(38) Good boy. Where? Cypress Social Club!
(39) Cypress- Cypress Social Club.
(40) Now, you're sure about that, ain't you?
(41) Good boy. Thanks for coming.
(42) Now, you can keep that.
(43) Fuck.
(44) Hello. Doc Miles.
(45) Yeah, Doc, it's Chev.
(46) Jesus H. Chelios.
(47) You gotta be kidding me.
(48) Listen. I'm deadly fucking serious, Doc.
(49) These Triad motherfuckers cut out my fucking heart...
(50) ...and put in one of those artificial jobs.
(51) You got an artificial heart?
(52) You think I'm having a fucking laugh?
(53) No, but you gotta admit, it's a little out there.
(54) You take your fucking time, Doc. You don't have any time.
(55) They're not designed to keep you alive more than a couple of days.
(56) And don't do anything strenuous. Yeah, sure, Doc. No problem.
(57) So, what's my next fucking move?
(58) We gotta get a real heart put in you, preferably your own.
(59) I'm on it. Okay, you're on it.
(60) Doc, Jesus fucking Christ! I'm sorry. Sorry.
(61) Let me- Does that thing have a belt battery pack?
(62) Check. How many bars are showing?
(63) One. Shit. That's better than none, I guess.
(64) Look, what they did you with is an Avicor Total Artificial Heart.
(65) It's got an internal battery that'll pick up once the belt battery dies.
(66) It's like a reserve tank.
(67) Once the internal battery takes over, you got one fucking hour.
(68) The internal battery charges wirelessly...
(69) ...through a transcutaneous energy-transfer system.
(70) Two coils There's one internal, one external.
(71) that transmit via a magnetic force across the skin...
(72) ...without piercing the surface.
(73) The internal coil receives power and sends it to the controller device.
(74) Does this make any fucking sense to you, Chevy?
(75) It's fucking Greek, Doc.
(76) Greek.
(77) Look, you gotta keep your body electrically charged...
(78) ... to keep that piece of shit pumping. Copy that.
(79) Hey, Chev? Yeah.
(80) I'm stoked you're alive, dude. I'll get back to you, Doc.
(81) Yeah. Call me.
(82) Fuck.
(83) Hey, hey, hey! That's a nice car.
(84) Don't suppose you know where the Cypress Social Club is, do you?
(85) Man, fuck that shit, puto. Let's race, יse.
(86) Don't you tempt me, fucker.
(87) What I need from you is directions.
(88) Shit.
(89) Damn, dog. You good, יse?
(90) Tiger fucking Woods.
(91) Never better.
(92) Greatest day of my fucking life.
(93) You couldn't point me in the direction of the Cypress Social Club, could you?
(94) Well, you ain't too far.
(95) Go down Orange for, like, 2 miles, and then you're there, homes.
(96) You mind giving me a jump?
(97) Just juice me.
(98) Anybody know where's the fucking Social Club?
(99) Donde esta la Social Club?
(100) Buenos nachos, white boy.
Tuesday, December 15, 2015
[2010] [Cop Out] English Transcripts
(1) Cop Out
(2) Do you know what today represents?
(3) Nine, Jim. Nine years me and you been together.
(4) Nine we been main shit stains.
(5) I know some dogs that don't even live to be nine.
(6) You lucky if you get seven years out of a Great Dane.
(7) But me and you been putting it in together for nine...
(8) Happy anniversary, Jim.
(9) I don't celebrate anniversaries. Jim, open it up.
(10) I wanna see the expression on your face. Wanna see the expression on my face?
(11) The expression you're gonna see on my face is "Fuck you."
(12) I hate anniversaries, Paul.
(13) Animal.
(14) How we gonna work this?
(15) Same way we always do. I interrogate him, you write it down.
(16) Oh, so you making decisions now?
(17) I hope the whole 6-9 know you're making decisions.
(18) I'm gonna play the bad guy on this one.
(19) Doubtful. Undoubtful.
(20) Highly doubtful.
(21) And you know why? Because you don't play the bad guy.
(22) You just steal all the bullshit lines you hear on TV and the movies that you like.
(23) And that's not acting. And it's not stealing. It's called homage.
(24) What? Homage.
(25) It's French for, "You better let me do this."
(26) You wanna interrogate this guy? Yes.
(27) Okay. Go in there, interrogate him and just don't fuck it up.
(28) Find out who his supplier is and then get out of there. All right?
(29) Yes. You act like this dude can't be interrogated.
(30) You act like he's Godzilla and I'm Tokyo.
(31) Watch and learn, Jimbo. I'm gonna show you some motherfucking homage.
(32) Homage.
(33) Unbelievable.
(34) Homage.
(35) Whoa, what you doing? Who the fuck are you? A cop?
(36) No, no, no. Put the gun down, man. Look.
(37) Cops think they can hold me. Hell, no. I'll kill all those fucking pigs.
(38) You in trouble, B? What?
(39) You... Don't waste my motherfucking time!
(40) Jesus Christ, now he's doing Al Pacino from Heat.
(41) Help me with these cuffs, dude. You see this gun?
(42) I killed a cop for it.
(43) ["KNIGHT RIDER" RINGTONE PLAYING ON PHONE]
(44) And I took his goddamn phone.
(45) You fuck me on this, and I'll blow your head off.
(46) Because King Kong ain't got nothing on me!
(47) Who's this? Now you're doing Training Day?
(48) Who's this? You suck as an actor.
(49) You stay out of here!
(50) Get the information, let's get out of here...
(51) ...and go get something to eat. Stop calling here!
(52) Or somebody's gonna die, bitch! Like a Reuben.
(53) If it bleeds, we can kill it! You see? What does that even mean?
(54) Yes, they deserved to die, and I hope they burn in hell!
(55) Hey, Paul. What?
(56) You had me at "happy anniversary."
(57) [CHUCKLES]
(58) I got the death penalty in 12 systems.
(59) Star Wars? Tell us about the chicken.
(60) Schindler's List? Lord knows I love Harpo.
(61) But if he hit me, I'll kill him dead. The Color Purple?
(62) The Forbidden Zone was once a paradise.
(63) I got no place else to go!
(64) We're gonna need a bigger boat.
(65) Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! Everything on cable TV.
(66) Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker! I've never seen that movie.
(67) I'm not gonna shoot you, Frank.
(68) [WHISPERING] Scarface.
(69) RAUL: Who are you, man?
(70) [IN NORMAL TONE] They call me Mr. Tibbs.
(71) Bobby, look at this. PAUL: What they got you for?
(72) Drugs. Drugs?
(73) You the motherfucker trying to take over my corners?
(74) Oh, jeez! You taking money out my pocket?
(75) Police!
(76) Oh, no, I don't sell it, man! I'm a middleman.
(77) Give me some of that. Godzilla is coming!
(78) Godzilla? Godzilla is coming!
(79) What we have here is failure to communicate!
(80) You gonna spend the night in the box!
(81) Frankly, Raul, I don't give a damn. And where...
(82) And where is the Batman? Batman? You're crazy, man. Police!
(83) Why'd you call back? They don't call back! Police!
(84) Nobody puts Baby in the corner!
(85) You suck!
(86) No, I swear, man.
(87) I swear they drop the stuff off at my cell phone store, then I take it to the next guy.
(88) Then what? That's it. That's all I know.
(89) Who does the drop? Who does the drop?
(90) Diaz, all right? Juan Diaz. Juan Diaz.
(91) PAUL: These are not the droids you're looking for.
(92) Sit down. Sit down right here.
(93) What the fuck? What the fuck is going...?
(94) You're gonna give us Juan Diaz, or you're going away for a long time.
(95) When's your next delivery? Look at me.
(96) I was supposed to meet him today, 1:00.
(97) Congratulations. You don't have to go to jail.
(98) You just been had by White Lightning. RAUL: What?
(99) And Black Thunder!
(100) A couple of dicks.
(2) Do you know what today represents?
(3) Nine, Jim. Nine years me and you been together.
(4) Nine we been main shit stains.
(5) I know some dogs that don't even live to be nine.
(6) You lucky if you get seven years out of a Great Dane.
(7) But me and you been putting it in together for nine...
(8) Happy anniversary, Jim.
(9) I don't celebrate anniversaries. Jim, open it up.
(10) I wanna see the expression on your face. Wanna see the expression on my face?
(11) The expression you're gonna see on my face is "Fuck you."
(12) I hate anniversaries, Paul.
(13) Animal.
(14) How we gonna work this?
(15) Same way we always do. I interrogate him, you write it down.
(16) Oh, so you making decisions now?
(17) I hope the whole 6-9 know you're making decisions.
(18) I'm gonna play the bad guy on this one.
(19) Doubtful. Undoubtful.
(20) Highly doubtful.
(21) And you know why? Because you don't play the bad guy.
(22) You just steal all the bullshit lines you hear on TV and the movies that you like.
(23) And that's not acting. And it's not stealing. It's called homage.
(24) What? Homage.
(25) It's French for, "You better let me do this."
(26) You wanna interrogate this guy? Yes.
(27) Okay. Go in there, interrogate him and just don't fuck it up.
(28) Find out who his supplier is and then get out of there. All right?
(29) Yes. You act like this dude can't be interrogated.
(30) You act like he's Godzilla and I'm Tokyo.
(31) Watch and learn, Jimbo. I'm gonna show you some motherfucking homage.
(32) Homage.
(33) Unbelievable.
(34) Homage.
(35) Whoa, what you doing? Who the fuck are you? A cop?
(36) No, no, no. Put the gun down, man. Look.
(37) Cops think they can hold me. Hell, no. I'll kill all those fucking pigs.
(38) You in trouble, B? What?
(39) You... Don't waste my motherfucking time!
(40) Jesus Christ, now he's doing Al Pacino from Heat.
(41) Help me with these cuffs, dude. You see this gun?
(42) I killed a cop for it.
(43) ["KNIGHT RIDER" RINGTONE PLAYING ON PHONE]
(44) And I took his goddamn phone.
(45) You fuck me on this, and I'll blow your head off.
(46) Because King Kong ain't got nothing on me!
(47) Who's this? Now you're doing Training Day?
(48) Who's this? You suck as an actor.
(49) You stay out of here!
(50) Get the information, let's get out of here...
(51) ...and go get something to eat. Stop calling here!
(52) Or somebody's gonna die, bitch! Like a Reuben.
(53) If it bleeds, we can kill it! You see? What does that even mean?
(54) Yes, they deserved to die, and I hope they burn in hell!
(55) Hey, Paul. What?
(56) You had me at "happy anniversary."
(57) [CHUCKLES]
(58) I got the death penalty in 12 systems.
(59) Star Wars? Tell us about the chicken.
(60) Schindler's List? Lord knows I love Harpo.
(61) But if he hit me, I'll kill him dead. The Color Purple?
(62) The Forbidden Zone was once a paradise.
(63) I got no place else to go!
(64) We're gonna need a bigger boat.
(65) Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! Everything on cable TV.
(66) Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker! I've never seen that movie.
(67) I'm not gonna shoot you, Frank.
(68) [WHISPERING] Scarface.
(69) RAUL: Who are you, man?
(70) [IN NORMAL TONE] They call me Mr. Tibbs.
(71) Bobby, look at this. PAUL: What they got you for?
(72) Drugs. Drugs?
(73) You the motherfucker trying to take over my corners?
(74) Oh, jeez! You taking money out my pocket?
(75) Police!
(76) Oh, no, I don't sell it, man! I'm a middleman.
(77) Give me some of that. Godzilla is coming!
(78) Godzilla? Godzilla is coming!
(79) What we have here is failure to communicate!
(80) You gonna spend the night in the box!
(81) Frankly, Raul, I don't give a damn. And where...
(82) And where is the Batman? Batman? You're crazy, man. Police!
(83) Why'd you call back? They don't call back! Police!
(84) Nobody puts Baby in the corner!
(85) You suck!
(86) No, I swear, man.
(87) I swear they drop the stuff off at my cell phone store, then I take it to the next guy.
(88) Then what? That's it. That's all I know.
(89) Who does the drop? Who does the drop?
(90) Diaz, all right? Juan Diaz. Juan Diaz.
(91) PAUL: These are not the droids you're looking for.
(92) Sit down. Sit down right here.
(93) What the fuck? What the fuck is going...?
(94) You're gonna give us Juan Diaz, or you're going away for a long time.
(95) When's your next delivery? Look at me.
(96) I was supposed to meet him today, 1:00.
(97) Congratulations. You don't have to go to jail.
(98) You just been had by White Lightning. RAUL: What?
(99) And Black Thunder!
(100) A couple of dicks.
[2014] [Cooties] English Transcripts
(1) (CLUCKING)
(2) Shh.
(3) (MAN OVER RADIO) It's a beautiful summer day in Chicago today.
(4) Temperatures expected to reach the upper 80s.
(5) In recent news, a health advisory was reported from Happy Poultry Farms.
(6) They're telling us they're issuing a full recall
(7) for their pre-cooked chicken tenders and also their buffalo chicken tenders.
(8) This only applies to chicken that was packaged Friday
(9) and delivered to Fort Chicken and Danville.
(10) (WOMAN) Morning, honey. Ahem.
(11) Rise and shine.
(12) Morning, Mum. How's the book going?
(13) Good. Yeah, I've been working really hard on it.
(14) Rewriting it. It's a first draught, you know. Did you get a chance
(15) to read the manuscript? I did and I loved it.
(16) Oh. Any thoughts? Criticisms? No, I thought it was wonderful.
(17) I won't become a better writer if I don't get constructive criticism. Please.
(18) I'm begging you. Well,
(19) um, I did think the characters were a tiny bit unlikeable.
(20) That's more like it. Noted. And it was a little slow.
(21) I found myself a little bored, to be honest.
(22) And I heart honesty. I also didn't know what was going on
(23) or where we were. It wasn't explained well.
(24) I couldn't figure out the plot. It was kind of insulting.
(25) And there was no specificity in terms of time and place.
(26) And where was the inciting incident? OK, OK, this is... Wow.
(27) Thank you, heh.
(28) But mostly I loved it.
(29) Now, get up and teach those summer school kids how to write like you.
(30) Chapter one. The boat was evil, but he loved the boat.
(31) Chapter one. The boat was evil, but he didn't know just how evil.
(32) The boat was evil,
(33) but it was an acceptable level of evil.
(34) Chapter one. The sea-faring vessel, The Schooner, was evil.
(35) Ah. It's getting there.
(36) Jesus. I've come full circle. How very, very utterly depressing.
(37) What's up, amigo? Hey.
(38) You're not my dealer. No, I'm Clint...
(39) Hey, you don't sell shrooms do you? No. I'm Clint Hadson.
(40) (MAN OVER RADIO) Is that Hudson?
(41) Hadson. Yeah, it's him. I'll let him in.
(42) Oh. So that's a no on the shrooms? Right.
(43) (COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)
(44) (CAR DOOR LOCK BLEEPS)
(45) (CLINT) Excuse me.
(46) I'm having trouble...
(47) (CLINT GRUNTING)
(48) (WOMAN) Don't you forget, you're grounded.
(49) When school's over you come straight home.
(50) Fuck you, Mum. (WOMAN) Oh, yeah? Fuck you.
(51) I'm just gonna miss you so much. Can't I take it off?
(52) No. The playground is a war zone.
(53) (GIRL GASPS)
(54) Watch it. Sorry. Didn't see you there.
(55) Well, maybe you should take in your surroundings more.
(56) Yeah.
(57) Mr. Hudson. (CLINT) Hadson.
(58) Hi. Uh, call me Clint. Righteous.
(59) Thanks for coming on such short notice.
(60) Mrs. Kenner is down with the flu, or maybe she's pregnant.
(61) She is Mormon, so that's a possibility.
(62) I'm vice principal Simms. Principal Hodges is in the Bahamas.
(63) You know what they say.
(64) When the cat's away, the vice principal becomes acting principal.
(65) I forgot they say that.
(66) (SIMMS) Teacher's lounge is across the way.
(67) Go get a cup of joe. It's not strong enough for my taste.
(68) To deal with these terrors I need the high-octane stuff. Isn't that right?
(69) Heh, she's hilarious. A lot of personal tragedy.
(70) Come on in to this office. Pull up a ball chair.
(71) Got a cell phone?
(72) Um, yeah.
(73) I'm gonna have to take it. Are you serious?
(74) Yep. This is a no cell-phone campus. We can't ask the kids to give up
(75) something we're not willing to. So hand over that crackberry.
(76) Booyah. Now, I gotta warn you, I run a pretty tight ship.
(77) Yeah, I'm fine with that.
(78) Heh, it's funny you should say that. I'm actually writing a book about a ship.
(79) Well, it's more of a boat. I have it with me.
(80) If you're asking me to describe my pedagogical "philosophy"
(81) I'm not. Some charter schools out of Boston
(82) are "absolutely" "revolutionising" "education."
(83) I'm not sure you know how air quotes work.
(84) I wanna bring these kids back to a pre-digital era.
(85) No cell phones, and I don't care if it's raining labradoodles,
(86) I wanna get those kids outside during recess.
(87) Heck, I'll lock them out. And I will do that.
(88) Now, here's a map of the school. Mrs. Kenner is in Room 12.
(89) Oh, I don't need that. I actually used to go here. Class of '88.
(90) Hey, you know what that is? That's out of sight.
(91) All right. Shouldn't joke about guns though.
(92) No. Not in a school.
(93) Yeah. That's not funny.
(94) My partner's name is David. He is awesome.
(95) He's a little bit older, but really has this amazing body.
(96) If I'm being completely honest,
(97) he does have these fantastic balls that I just love to play with.
(98) They're firmer and fuzzier, so...
(99) Heh, tennis partner. Heh, David's my tennis partner. Heh.
(100) Hi there. Um, you know which one of these is Mrs. Kenner's?
(2) Shh.
(3) (MAN OVER RADIO) It's a beautiful summer day in Chicago today.
(4) Temperatures expected to reach the upper 80s.
(5) In recent news, a health advisory was reported from Happy Poultry Farms.
(6) They're telling us they're issuing a full recall
(7) for their pre-cooked chicken tenders and also their buffalo chicken tenders.
(8) This only applies to chicken that was packaged Friday
(9) and delivered to Fort Chicken and Danville.
(10) (WOMAN) Morning, honey. Ahem.
(11) Rise and shine.
(12) Morning, Mum. How's the book going?
(13) Good. Yeah, I've been working really hard on it.
(14) Rewriting it. It's a first draught, you know. Did you get a chance
(15) to read the manuscript? I did and I loved it.
(16) Oh. Any thoughts? Criticisms? No, I thought it was wonderful.
(17) I won't become a better writer if I don't get constructive criticism. Please.
(18) I'm begging you. Well,
(19) um, I did think the characters were a tiny bit unlikeable.
(20) That's more like it. Noted. And it was a little slow.
(21) I found myself a little bored, to be honest.
(22) And I heart honesty. I also didn't know what was going on
(23) or where we were. It wasn't explained well.
(24) I couldn't figure out the plot. It was kind of insulting.
(25) And there was no specificity in terms of time and place.
(26) And where was the inciting incident? OK, OK, this is... Wow.
(27) Thank you, heh.
(28) But mostly I loved it.
(29) Now, get up and teach those summer school kids how to write like you.
(30) Chapter one. The boat was evil, but he loved the boat.
(31) Chapter one. The boat was evil, but he didn't know just how evil.
(32) The boat was evil,
(33) but it was an acceptable level of evil.
(34) Chapter one. The sea-faring vessel, The Schooner, was evil.
(35) Ah. It's getting there.
(36) Jesus. I've come full circle. How very, very utterly depressing.
(37) What's up, amigo? Hey.
(38) You're not my dealer. No, I'm Clint...
(39) Hey, you don't sell shrooms do you? No. I'm Clint Hadson.
(40) (MAN OVER RADIO) Is that Hudson?
(41) Hadson. Yeah, it's him. I'll let him in.
(42) Oh. So that's a no on the shrooms? Right.
(43) (COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING OVER SPEAKERS)
(44) (CAR DOOR LOCK BLEEPS)
(45) (CLINT) Excuse me.
(46) I'm having trouble...
(47) (CLINT GRUNTING)
(48) (WOMAN) Don't you forget, you're grounded.
(49) When school's over you come straight home.
(50) Fuck you, Mum. (WOMAN) Oh, yeah? Fuck you.
(51) I'm just gonna miss you so much. Can't I take it off?
(52) No. The playground is a war zone.
(53) (GIRL GASPS)
(54) Watch it. Sorry. Didn't see you there.
(55) Well, maybe you should take in your surroundings more.
(56) Yeah.
(57) Mr. Hudson. (CLINT) Hadson.
(58) Hi. Uh, call me Clint. Righteous.
(59) Thanks for coming on such short notice.
(60) Mrs. Kenner is down with the flu, or maybe she's pregnant.
(61) She is Mormon, so that's a possibility.
(62) I'm vice principal Simms. Principal Hodges is in the Bahamas.
(63) You know what they say.
(64) When the cat's away, the vice principal becomes acting principal.
(65) I forgot they say that.
(66) (SIMMS) Teacher's lounge is across the way.
(67) Go get a cup of joe. It's not strong enough for my taste.
(68) To deal with these terrors I need the high-octane stuff. Isn't that right?
(69) Heh, she's hilarious. A lot of personal tragedy.
(70) Come on in to this office. Pull up a ball chair.
(71) Got a cell phone?
(72) Um, yeah.
(73) I'm gonna have to take it. Are you serious?
(74) Yep. This is a no cell-phone campus. We can't ask the kids to give up
(75) something we're not willing to. So hand over that crackberry.
(76) Booyah. Now, I gotta warn you, I run a pretty tight ship.
(77) Yeah, I'm fine with that.
(78) Heh, it's funny you should say that. I'm actually writing a book about a ship.
(79) Well, it's more of a boat. I have it with me.
(80) If you're asking me to describe my pedagogical "philosophy"
(81) I'm not. Some charter schools out of Boston
(82) are "absolutely" "revolutionising" "education."
(83) I'm not sure you know how air quotes work.
(84) I wanna bring these kids back to a pre-digital era.
(85) No cell phones, and I don't care if it's raining labradoodles,
(86) I wanna get those kids outside during recess.
(87) Heck, I'll lock them out. And I will do that.
(88) Now, here's a map of the school. Mrs. Kenner is in Room 12.
(89) Oh, I don't need that. I actually used to go here. Class of '88.
(90) Hey, you know what that is? That's out of sight.
(91) All right. Shouldn't joke about guns though.
(92) No. Not in a school.
(93) Yeah. That's not funny.
(94) My partner's name is David. He is awesome.
(95) He's a little bit older, but really has this amazing body.
(96) If I'm being completely honest,
(97) he does have these fantastic balls that I just love to play with.
(98) They're firmer and fuzzier, so...
(99) Heh, tennis partner. Heh, David's my tennis partner. Heh.
(100) Hi there. Um, you know which one of these is Mrs. Kenner's?
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